Letter to my Grandpa

My paternal Grandma passed away on 6/6/09. After some sleepless nights and a cloudy state of mind, I've finally built up the courage to write my Grandpa a letter. I know death is a part of life, and everyone has their time to go. The thing that hurts me the most is to know that one day we will lose our companion. Sure, "don't get too attached" they say--but that bond of love and companionship is inevitable. Love doesn't die when a person does, and I know my Grandparents had their own way of doing things that made their love so obvious to the outside world.
I am so thankful for being able to visit them last October when I went to India. There were laughs and words shared with my Grandma that are ingrained in my memory. She was a very humorous person, and always thanked me for teaching her to forget about the nonsense dramatic lives people in India often live. Her laugh was such a loud cry of happiness, and it always had you laughing even if something wasn't funny. We shared the same joy in imitating people and making light of a situation. Her discipline and laugh will forever hold a place in my mind and heart. I'll miss you Daadi, rest in peace.

The letter:

June 10, 2009
Dearest Dada,

I hope you are coping well. The sad news was a shock to all of us, and the important thing is for us to have our family members surround us in order to provide comfort. I am thankful for being able to spend time with both of you when I came to India last October. I have engrained certain moments and words Daadi and I shared, and consider them a significant influence in my life.
How are you doing? Right now everybody must be visiting in and out of the house to keep you company. You have lost your companion but please do not feel you are all alone. You are fortunate to have your brothers, Naimish Kaka/Hema Kaki and Sapna/Harshal nearby to take care of you and keep you company. Spending time with Sapna and Harshal will keep your mind off of things because a growing kid's life always has something new and spontaneous going on.
I miss Daadi very much, but I also understand these things a part of life and everyone has their time to go. On Thursday, as you all are participating in the "uthamnu, " we will be visiting a Mandir and conducting some prayers. On Friday, Dad's friend K.B. Uncle is coming in the evening and we will be chanting some slokas and verses from the Gita. As a final closure, Bina Fai family and us will visit a nearby Balaji Mandir and then eat dinner consisting of Daadi's favorite foods.
To provide you a change of scenery, you can consider coming here and staying with us for however long. Bina Fai is coming there in a few weeks, so this should make you feel good as well.

Whosever life Daadi's soul is destined to touch, we know that person will live a good life just as Daadi did. Please take care of yourself and surround yourself amongst our close family members so that you do not feel alone. We are here for you should you need anything.

Love and Peace,
Nisha

A Duty Revisited

In my "religion" although it merely is, it has been a forever fact that each of us exist to serve an individual duty. As humans, our sole purpose for existence is to convey a duty through consistent action. Everything is done in hopes of ultimately omitting ourselves from this cycle of returning as another version in order to take care of unfinished business from a past life.

HOW?

How do we know what each of us are here to fulfill? Many believe we all share one duty: to serve. To serve those less fortunate than us, to give more and take less, and to complete a responsibility in every role we play in life. But is serving really a united duty? Are we all here for the same exact reason despite the dynamic lifestyle we've all resorted to?

I often question the validity of the belief that we share a united duty. I say this because our experiences are what distinguish us as individuals. In a microscopic view, we are all different. In a macroscopic sense, everyone is connected. Although our overall purpose is the same, our means to achieve it is not.

I'm starting to believe that a person's duty becomes evident based on a pattern of similar experiences that occur in a given lifestyle. Maybe everything we go through is a karmic reaction from a past life. Essentially, one may be living in the perspective of a person he/she hurt in their previous life. After all, isn't that the way we're taught to empathize with other people? Do we not encourage our peers to put themselves in other peoples' shoes to get a better grip on a situation?

Reflections. If we reflect on our own curve balls in life through the eyes of another person, perhaps this will open the door of an epiphany of what our own duty is. For the sake of comic relief, I'd say finding out what we were in our past life is like the phrase "how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?"...the world may never know. BUT, maybe one way to find out is to put things that happen to us in someone else's perspective. This will enable us to realize why we face the trials and tribulations that we do.

Consider this: the lives we live are essentially a series of the same images from previous lives. Our duty is really to revisit these images that change because our perceptions change. It takes cycles to cover all viewpoints and understand the standard emotions of love, hate, happy and healthy. Once the stage has been set and you've had a chance to play different roles in the same scene, your duty is then fulfilled.

*addendum to follow

Khush sent this and I thought it was hilarious....

Pants and Panties



Mike was going to be married to Karen
so his Father sat him down for a little chat.

He said, 'Mike, let me tell you s om ething.
On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your Mother, and said, 'Here, try these on.''

She did and said, 'These are too big.
I can't wear them.'

I replied, 'Exactly.. I wear the pants in
this family and I always will.'



Ever since that night, we have
never had any problems.

'Hmmm,' said Mike. He thought that might be a good thing to try.

On his honeymoon, Mike took off his pants and said to Karen, 'Here, try these on..'

She tried them on and said, 'These are too large. They don't fit me.'



Mike said, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family

and I always will. I don't want you to ever forget that.'

Then Karen took off her panties and handed them to Mike. She said, 'Here, you try on mine.'

Mike did and said,
'I can't get into your panties.'

Karen said, 'Exactly. And if you don't change
your smart-ass attitude, you never will.'

I've caved. After so many years (although once upon a time I did have a Xanga), I think it's that time to start writing my thoughts out again. Unlike my xanga days, I'm striving for these entries to be less emotional and more spontaneous. Think of it as that dance party you can't wait to bust out to after a crazy week living life. It doesn't matter if you have two left feet or still don't know how to snap your fingers, nobody's watching and it's all meant to just get your mind off of things!

Do a lil' dance, make a lil' love...